Awfully Delightful 90's: 15-11

Getting there, getting there...

15. Semi-Charmed Life (Third Eye Blind). The third (but not final) song to appear in the ultimate 1990's Comedy (American Pie) and when I really think about, probably the prototypical 90's band name. Three monosyllabic words with a teenage perverted undertone. While the song stays true to the trend of whining about how bad/boring your life sucks, it also has a shallow hint of heroin usage- possibly THE drug du jor of the decade for everyone who wasn't hanging out at the Limelight or the Tunnel.

14. Runaway Train (Soul Assylum). I'd have to study the charts, but this might be the original bubble-grunge song. (Like the genre I just created?). Borrowing from the late 1980's (think Fly High Michelle, The Ballad of Jayne or Fly to the Angels), Train is not about the artists sucky drug infested life, but that of somebody near and dear to him. A lost art, really. But everything else fits the mold, and this awful masterpiece was the Jackie Robinson of the Upbeat and Depressing (yes, I'm aware those are polar opposite emotions).

13. Mmmmm, Mmmmm (Crash Test Dummies). Make no mistake: Of the 50 songs on my list, this is CLEARLY the most awful. A 100% pointles song, it tells fables with no real moral to the story about a kid who got in an accident, a family that spazzed the F out in church, and a girl who had a lot of birthmarks. You really can't make this stuff up. However, it's just catchy and stupid enough to bring a modecum of delight to this listener, and coupled with it's high Awful score, it cracks the top 15.

12. Good Riddance/Time of Your Life (Green Day). I'm so happy that I graduated high school two years before this song came out, cause there's no way that Bon Jovi's "Never Say Goodbye" would have beat out this Made-For-Prom-Tune in a million years. Instead I got to dance so close, dance so slow, swear I'd never let you go with my future wife. I haven't been to many proms lately, but I'm going to go on the assumption that this pretty much broke Wonderful Tonight's record for most proms ended. Now, I like Green Day, like them a lot. Dookie was the pefect album for a 17 year old just waking up to the world in 1994, and American Idiot was the perfect, absolutely ultimate capsule of La Resistance during the Bush Error to those oh-so-few-of-us who could see beyond the basic platitudes of "Terra". But in all fairness, this song is hysterically bad. Just bad enough that it made our wedding playlist and our table-gift CD.

11. It Was A Good Day (Ice Cube). I have a fundamental issue with this song. I understand how no barking from the dog and no smog would quantify a great morning and all. But Mama made a breakfast with no hog? That's good? For the same person who hits Fat Burger at 2 AM? Also, while playing basketball last week, Ice Cube fucked around and got a triple double? WHO THE HELL COUNTS THEIR ASSISTS ON THE PLAYGROUND? Or rebounds and points for that matter. Aint' that type of selfish play gonna get you in some pretty deep trouble in South Central LA? All in all, I'm glad Mr. Cube finally, at age 24 got with that girl he was trying to make love to since the 12th grade. And doubly glad that it's considered ironic when one person has the beer and the other's god weed.